Immune system

by Paula Johanson

Here's a monologue from the book Modern Rituals.

Parent discussion group at the Community Centre

"You're worried about compulsory AIDS testing at work? What you've got to understand, Lisa, is we don't know what to do with the medicine we've got.

"You don't get it? Okay, I'll spell one scenario out for you all. Can you pour me some more tea first, Carol? Thanks.

"Picture a common childhood disease -- common enough among Europeans and North Americans, anyway, that most of our kids are exposed at an early age and have sufficient medical care that the disease isn't serious in most cases. Kids spend two or three weeks home from school.

"Now, where medical services are inadequate, the disease can cause many deaths through fever and secondary infections like pneumonia. Got it? That's not just in Third World countries, but in the U S of Assholes where Medicare still doesn't apply to all the working poor like us.

"The cookies are over here, Janice. We'll pass them round. Want me to go on with the story?

"Let's add another twist to this disease: if a pregnant woman catches it, there's a one in four chance her baby will be born blind or deaf. Sounds nasty? Sounds like motivation for developing a vaccine.

"Sure enough, one exists. It's in general use in North America and Europe too ... except among religious groups like the Amish, conscientious objectors, believers in wholistic medicine and the like.

"Why? Lots of reasons, Carol. Some of these people believe it's an infringement of their human rights to inject their bodies with a vaccine, especially for a disease that may not present them with much danger.

"Whose kid is crying, can you tell? Wait a minute, sounds like the sitter's got it all under control again.

"Now, the reason they're not in great danger from this disease is that most of the rest of us are immunized. An epidemic is limited to dozens of cases, not thousands in our cities. But let's not quibble about other people's moral beliefs until we hear more about this vaccine.

"Janice, you were at the pro-life rally last week, weren't you? You'll like this part.

"Let's do some research and reveal that this vaccine was developed in Germany using cells from an aborted fetus.

"The word refers both to miscarriages and therapeutic procedures, and no, I won't specify which is meant by the term 'aborted.'

"Nowadays the new batches of vaccine are whomped up in a lab, probably without any fetal cells involved at all, but the problem remains: this preventative medical procedure, this vaccine shot, was developed by using fetal tissues in a manner that is morally abhorrent to many people.

"There are people who donate blood, and who've signed their organ donor cards, but who will not approve of unconsenting and unethical use of human tissue. They sweat blood about whether to immunize themselves and their kids with the product of an abhorrent medical technology.

"I'm sorry, I've been ranting again. Yes, it's a real disease. It's rubella, the German measles.

"Yes, it's true, Lisa, and yes, I've been immunized.

"Shit, I think the discussion group was quieter when we talked about the pro-life and the pro-choice rallies. I'm sorry to lecture, but it's true, medical ethics is shit.

"You're worried about compulsory AIDS testing? They haven't even passed industry guidelines that protect Video Display Terminal operators yet. We don't even have decent maternity leave legislation, like they do in Sweden.

"Problems -- oh, hell, have we got problems. There isn't a single law about medical ethics -- that has teeth -- that doesn't do grief to somebody."